Saturday, July 3, 2010
A Heart of Thanksgiving
Thank you for reading. I pray that the Lord bestows upon you love, mercy, wisdom, and a thankful heart.
p.s. James of the New Testament is a great book to read if you are in need :)
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Pictures
Here are a few: http://s878.photobucket.com/albums/ab343/Team_Nepal_2010/
Hope you enjoy :)
Teach Me Mercy
(The date may say the 29th, U.S. vs. Nepal time zones = big difference)
Just two more night at our Ganesh Himal hotel. Emotions are running a bit high, exhaustion is becoming overwhelming, and time is quickly vanishing. The last few days have been filled with the same ministries we have been involved with since our return from Pokhara, but just a little bit more packed... did I say a little bit? I meant jam packed. Everyone wants to do everything, we still have many tasks to complete (finished the translating yesterday!), and I am here writing this blog to you. Its a necessary outlet, right? :)
As I have mentioned previously, many of my team members believe they will return to Nepal. I'm excited to see how that all lays out, but only time will reveal those events. Many conversations have to do with the love we have discovered for the people we are both serving and serving alongside. An abundance of tears is sure to come in the next few weeks as their hearts will break from being separated from their passions and from one another. And where does that place me as a leader? A rather difficult situation. I am relieved that they will be a phone call away, some a half hour drive, but I will still be responsible for them to an extent. They are now my babies, I am already having separation anxiety, and I don't want them to walk any lonely roads by themselves. God give me wisdom, love, strength, the right words to say, or silent understanding.
It is raining lightly. Perhaps Kathmandu is sad to see us go. I just can't stop wondering who will return, when, for how long, and what they will be doing. Guess praying is all I can do for now.
My thoughts, oddly, have been all about doing a YWAM DTS (Youth With a Mission Discipleship Training School). Two days ago I was growing frustrated with the fact that I hadn't taken time out earlier, while after high school or during college to do a DTS. Fortunately, the Lord quickly calmed me saying that I was exactly where I was suppose to be and had walked the correct path placed before me. But, why has this desire sprung up in me so quickly and now. In times past, I thought that it would be cool to do.. one day... I even put it on a time line of my life in a Consumer Behavior course I took last summer at APU. But now, I'm done with college, I'm starting a real-life job in just a few weeks. When in the world will I have the chance to take 6 months + off to do a DTS?! I don't know. I do not know. I have no idea. But, why has this been placed inside me with a this silly giddy hope? Any ideas? Please!
Another rant for your entertainment, joy :)
Today will consist of many different things. But, tonight! We are having a party at Shushmas (one of our wonderful translators) and she is making us Dal Bot (I haven't a clue what I am going to do without it in the states, I crave it always, and have it typically every other day) and lots of wonderful people are coming. It should be a delight.
Thanks for your interest and your prayers.
I hope you understand that they truly do change the world.
All my love,
Corinne
p.s. Title 'Teach Me Mercy' has to do with recent scripture readings. I love the book of James. I read 1st Peter and many others as well & a theme that I have been stuck on is mercy. We will be given mercy to the extent that we have given it to others. I cannot recall a personal example as to how I have shown mercy. I do not think I understand what exactly it is. The clique answer = not getting something that you rightly deserve. But, how does this play out in day-to-day living? How can I act in such a way? Part of my asks God to give me opportunities, but then does that somehow translate into: "Have someone wrong me so that I can practice mercy." Why in the world would I make such a request?
I don't know once again. And now I will laugh at my ignorance. O, Lord I teach me wisdom and the opportunity to learn the true meaning of mercy. (other then clearly the mercy He has given each of us through His death & resurrection & therefore, salvation & eternity with Him forever!)
K, k, truly I am done!
Friday, June 25, 2010
He is Truth
Thursday, June 24, 2010
And He is Love
Saturday, June 19, 2010
God is Good & God is Faithful
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Nepal: Kathmandu & Chitwan
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Written on the 3rd of June
Decided to do highlights :) (These are tidbits, leaving out a lot, sorry!)
29 May: Church was so different, but so great.
We visited a children's home which had 40 kids. 40! The father's name is Bishnu & he is AMAZING. He is nearly blind and joked about still riding his motorcycle super fast. The game I was taken to at the beginning of play involved throwing chickens in the air. I had never done this before, it was quite alarming at first, but hilarious. After a time of playing several games with the young ones I made sure to spend time with the older girls (who are highschoolish age) and they love all the attention though they try to act whateverish at first. They called me sister to get my attention and held my hand wherever we went. I loved wandering around, taking pictures, and being clung to, truly. I think it is of the upmost importance that I focus on the older girls at whatever homes we visit. That night we played mafia at Johns, I won as the mafia, but walked away with an upset tummy & headache from lying. I don't want to be the bad guy again, lol. Rode on the back of a motorcyle today. If my mother reads this you should skip the next sentence :) On motorcyles only the driver wears a helmet & the roads are horrid, it is crazy dangerous in my opinion.
30 May: Breakfast at Northfields, our usual, with one of our contacts who shared stories that would blow anyones mind. I feel that my faith lacks so drastically when these tales are told. I pray for an expansion of faith every day. "Faith the size of a mustard seed moves mountains." What is the size of my faith? Why do I feel so incredibly small and incapable when this is God's promise? In the afternoon we went to my favorite home so far. Motorcycle ride again, saw my life flash before my eyes too many times, but this expands my prayer life, lol. The home was way out away from much of the city noise. The children were beautiful and the family was humble to the greatest extent possible. I loved everything. "Can I move in please?!" Sidenote: Before this trip I didn't know how many kids I wanted if any, now I want to fill my house with bunkbeds and kids. lol, this may change, but it is so wonderful to see here and now. && they called me dede (big sister is Nepali <3)
31 May: Pashtupati = Mother Teresa's home for the elderly = Incredibly devoted nuns/sisters ordering us about doing hard hard work all for Jesus. I cleaned beds, swept, moped, fed people that were SUPER old. I felt like the hands and feet of my Lord and it felt amazing. I was dripping in sweat, dripping, like hot yoga style, lol. The moping is INTENSE. You haven't moped until you have moped for a sister of a Mother Teresa's home. Truth. I was exhausted by the end of the shift. We got there around 8am and I thought it was probably 4pm when we finally were given juice as our thankyou. It was like 11:30, WHAT?! That was only 3&1/2 hours and I am ready for a full night of sleep please. Feeding the oldest individual there, a woman of 97 was something that changed my life. Definitely was frightened at first. I'm sorta scared of elderly. But, I just went for it and I will remember those moments for the rest of my life. I wish there had been a picture take. God will show me one later I'm sure :)
1 June: We worked at Pashtupati. I did much of the same, but helped bathe the women instead of feed them. I was frightened, but once again my world was shaken a bit. Hands and feet baby! It was so good. In the afternoon we went to a prayer time where many representatives come from different organizations to pray for their shared cause of fighting the trafficking of women and children. I loved hearing about the different organizations and what God is doing in their midst. Weak networking is probably what hinders the most growth in stopping this injustice. The traffickers have an incredibly strong network, those fighting them need to have a stronger one. Many organizations stick to themselves and their area, but to see some come together as a unified body was awesome. This is a prayer request: The good guys band together, recognize they are fighting the same fight, and can use each others strengths to cover any weaknesses. And beat the bad guys. God is on their side without a doubt.
2 June: Pashtupati day 3. We finished sanding and painting all of the beds blue. Finally. We then met with an organization that benefits women working in massage parlors, dance bars, and cabins (all which sell sex) through education, medical, counseling, and teaching other trades for them to go into. They seemed to be a newer organization with room for a lot of growth. They were not Christian, but very excited to have us visit. They asked us to volunteer if we have any time later on in our stay. I asked a woman what we would be doing and it sounds like they just want to pick our brain for advice and ideas. They asked if we would put together a report of all of our findings during our time in Nepal. I had never thought of this before, but it could truly make a different. We could send it to all the organizations we visited, the government, other governments (India where girls are trafficked to), and countless others. I pray that fruit will come from such efforts. At this organization a representative from the U.S. Embassy joined us. He was American, his mother-in-law actually went to APU, coincidence :) He specializes in the political & economical areas of Nepal. He was a great addition to our meeting. He wants us to meet the Ambassador. We are to call him a week before our departure to set something up and they want a copy of our essay if we put one together. SO COOL.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Ok, update that isn't too updated :)
We have been working with children and the elderly for the most part. Its hard work, really hard, but it is so worth it. I fall asleep feeling like a follower of Jesus, the true Jesus who served everyone around Him. The one who calls us to feed the hungry, clothe the poor, love the fatherless, the widows, etc. I feel that I am doing exactly what He would be doing if He were here and its unbelievable.
That was my quick overview of my feelings. Read more if you want to hear more day-by-day :)
Friday, 28 May:
We traveled by bus to this ancient city of Bhaktapur (touristy). The bus ride was drastically bumpy... and an hour long. I have slight remaining marks of the bruises I received to my knees. There were shooting pains through my tummy, normal? I don't think so. Anyways, CRAZY adventure. We wandered around. I had children, beautiful children begging me for 5 rupees (1 dollar = 75 rupees) or a biscuit, which lasts in their bellies perhaps a couple hours? There were men behind several of them directing them. Sick to my stomach ready to punch? Yes. Christ like? No. But, we aren't to give them anything. Then I struggle with what Jesus would do. Then I struggle with what I actually do. I was reprimanded for being nice & asking their names, I guess I'm suppose to forcefully say no and turn my back ignoring them? What?! This is not okay to me. Prior to this I had turned down women asking me to buy milk for their skinny babies. Tears in my eyes walking away with Mr Chandler praying & singing Jesus songs to me. Back to it. We had a wonderful and cheap lunch (we maybe are spending 60 dollars a day for our entire team to eat) (and everything tastes GOOD) and continued to walk about. We had to depart in order to visit Children's Homes. My favorite. The group split into 2 & we went to different homes filled with children that were saved while at risk before actually being trafficked. The homes are set up with a Christian Nepalese mother and father (who are some of the greatest people God has every created) who pretty much adopt these kids (ages 3ish+). They are a family and the kids live with them until they find real jobs or get married or decide to move into their own home (not typical in any family in Nepal). The number of children in homes range from 6-40.40! Yes, you read that right. It is the happiest most joy filled moments we spend at these homes. The smile on just one child (thinking of one in particular) is enough to say the trip was fully worth it.
Saturday, 29 (I'll Write later)
News I have heard:
Death of Mr Coleman
Celine is prego with twins
Bangladesh has banded Facebook
LOVE OUT LOUD. Your prayers are changing my trip, changing the organizations I am working with, changing the lives of girls (trafficking), and ultimately changing Nepal.
God is good, Amen!
Thursday, May 27, 2010
First full day in Kathmandu
Currently in the hotel the team is staying at. Its 9:45pm and I am exhausted! I feel that I have already been here a week, seriously. We arrived yesterday after days of flying. Airport was a little different then my norm. First people I saw were women carrying bricks on their backs building an extension onto the airport itself. It was hot, they were in flip flops, and the men were inside a) with guns patrolling or b) checking out our visas. It was a little surreal. We were picked up at the airport, Praise the LORD, and just walking to the bus involved refusing many peoples 'charged help' or 'paid labor' carrying our bags and such. The ride to the hotel was unbelievable. I felt that I was in a movie. I could never have imagined this. People everywhere, many roads are dirt, trash lines the streets in front of buildings that look like they have been abandoned for a hundred years except for the laundry line. There are no rules for driving, it is utter madness with buses, motorcycles, pedestrians, rickshaws, regular cars, bicycles. Did I say madness?! Truth. I would not drive here. Period. The hotel we are staying at is in great condition compared to much of the surrounding area. I feel completely safe and taken care of. There is a restaurant attached, therefore, in case of emergency we can stay at the hotel for a few days if necessary. There is beautiful garden in the back that is completely surrounded by giant buildings. I absolutely love it. I am rooming with Taylor & Angela, both wonderful, wonderful girls. We walked to dinner (I was slightly hesitant to say the least), but Rhoman was with us. Praise the Lord again and always. I have entered another world. I don't know how else to say it. Words could never describe the city of Kathmandu, Nepal. At the end of the day I wanted to go home.
Today, was a new day, new opportunities, new chance to change my previous attitude, and everything else. It was Buddha's birthday, a national holiday. We had tea at Rhomans (some of the best tea of my life) and proceeded onto breakfast, which was delicious as well (eggs, bacon, toast - you know, American :)). The afternoon consisted of visiting the Monkey Temple. There were millions of people there. You couldn't stay together in a group. It was hundreds of stairs that felt straight up. We were in the middle of a whole lot of worship to Buddha in a city stronghold that looked out over Kathmandu. To say I was slightly overwhelmed would be a lie. I was FREAKING out, I couldn't handle it. The darkness there was unbelievable and all of the people carrying so much oppression upon them and so little hope -hope they have is Buddha, who lets face it, is a dead man. If you want to hear more, we should have a one-on-one when I get back.
Next step was Tiny Hands Nepal. Amazing, AMAZING. Check out their website. All that they are doing is unbelievable. God is at work in Nepal even when darkness is just down the street. I want to be associated with this organization for forever. I hope that I can be apart of all that they are doing. It is altering the reality that is Nepal. They save over 1,000 girls a year from being trafficked into the sex industry of India.
I must go. Taken way too much time already. Hope to hear something back from you :)
Comments or email at cpaget08@apu.edu
My gmail is definitely not working here.
Love big
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Singapore Airport
Its humid and it is the middle of the night.
One more flight and we will be in Kathmandu. Our contact picks us up from the airport and I think we will head to the hotel, but its really whatever he has in mind, though I know we are all very tired. Feels like a never ending day & sleep doesn't help, but to pass the time.
What feels like this morning (though it was the morning of the 24th and it is now morning of the 26th here in Singapore) we had a commissioning prayer time, which was so great! Lots of friends came to see us off and promise to be in prayer for us.
Last night we had a worship & prayer night at one of the Resident Director's homes in University Park. Jonny Liu. It was amazing and exactly what my team needed. The words that were shared, the promises made, and the prophecies proclaimed were mind blowing. God is so good and He has a lot of crazy things for us to accomplish while in Nepal.
All for now as I am about to be kicked off the computer due to time limits :)
Thank you for the prayers! Hope to update you again soon. Please pray for the city of Kathmandu and the political situation that is going down right now. Not ideal, but praying for a safe, harmonious outcome soon.
Love, Corinne
Friday, May 14, 2010
May 14th
Graduation took place just this last Saturday, almost a week ago, so crazy. I am having some difficulty wrapping my brain around reality. Currently, I am home in Redding (I feel like I have 3 homes) writing thank you notes, spending time with family, and trying my best to prepare for my trip to Nepal, which is just over a week away. The missions work hasn't really set in yet either, I'm just in this in between delusional place. Its difficult because all of these are good things, but so much change is overwhelming to say the least.
My family came down to Azusa for my graduation (this included by dads parents, his brother, wife, and two daughters, as well as my mom's mom, mom's sister, husband, and their son David). It was a delight to have them all in town and help me celebrate, there was just so much going on that everything together was not manageable. I was moving to my new apartment in Anaheim! (thepromenadeatanaheim.com choose Broadway Arms) I will be living there with 3 other APU girls!! Two of which were my residents and next door neighbors: Dani Davis & Ashley Morgan, as well as Alex Tillapaugh, whom I have mentioned in a previous blog. I was buying and setting up new furniture, like you know, a bed, dresser, and everything that an apartment entails. I was checking out my 50 residents, super crazy. I was finishing up last minute papers as well as my last couple days of work at University Relations. I was trying to make time for my Nepal team and packing for that trip. I bought a CAR!! Tried to spend as much time with friends as possible and o ya, I graduated college. You know, my life's not psycho busy or anything. (BUT, I LOVE IT)
Anyways, I miss APU & my loves there way too much already. I have already had three of my closest friends leave on missions trips to Ghana, South Africa, and Cambodia, and more are getting ready to leave. Crazy good, but terrible to be away from them, but all I can do is pray. I have enjoyed the peace that home is. Redding is the opposite of Azusa. Like complete opposite and I love that I will always have the ability to escape away here.
I have been in conversation with my mentor, Jeremy at MHM. I am very excited for work (though no vacation days till Thanksgiving is a little depressing) and the first few months will be a make it or (well, I won't break it) period. I'm anxious to start there as I know that the Lord has called me for a very specific purpose in each of the lives of the individuals I will be working with. Every day will be my missions field and I am overjoyed at this prospect.
God's love reaches to the heavens, and His faithfulness stretches to the skies. His righteousness is like the mightly mountains, and His justice flows deep. How priceless is His unfailing love. -Psalm 36 5-7
Thursday, March 25, 2010
March 25th. A Thursday.
A lot is going on. The Lord’s preparing me for change yet again. Never to be settled, but always learning and moving forth. I have come to the conclusion that change is a good thing, yet difficult still. Moving on means you have learned what the Lord has designed for you to learn in that phase or chapter and is pushing you forward to bigger and better things. Graduation is right around the corner. I’m apartment hunting. However! I have found a roommate Alex Tillapaugh, whom I adore. She is a beautiful delight and I could not be more excited. Once again! God is always faithful. Though she will be the one steadfast similarity outside of God everything else is new and that is scary.
My mission trip this summer has required a flexible and willing spirit from everyone on my team. The big news: Looks like we will be going to Nepal instead of Bangladesh. We will be working with the same organizations, just in a different location. This is what God wants and requires and we are more than open to His plan.
Last weekend we had a fundraiser that was quite a lot of fun. We had an auction date night. Our friends bid (through email) to win us for a group date. It was held at Justin’s with games and dessert. It was a time filled of laughter, excitement, and love.
In other news: Its practically Easter Vacation. I will be flying home Sunday evening for a week with my family. I am looking forward to this tremendously. I am a little worried about being “home sick” from some of my friends that I adore and see every day. I feel that the more I spend time with someone the more I need to spend time with them. However, if a week is troubling to me now, I can’t image six weeks and then you know… moving away from them.
Life: Its all about choice. The atmosphere I carry depends on me and God. My attitude and emotions are my decision. I will take these steps with grace, love, peace, righteousness, striving to practice the gifts of the Holy Spirit. Lord, help me. To you be all the glory, honor, and praise.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
The formation
Hi J
Last semester Justin and I found our perfect team of 4 girls + 4 boys, plus us. They are each brilliant and have so much to bring to the team. Shockingly no one is musically talented, but boy can we dance! Lol J Our first team night took place on the night of a school wide event called Christmas Chaos and everyone certainly hit it off. The following week we had sleepovers, the girls at my place, boys at Justin’s after a time of frozen yogurt. Christmas break then took us from one another for a time. Justin and I were required to be back on campus early because we are apart of RezLife and had a training week. We were able to meet up with our Tiny Hands contact and chat with him about the organization and how we could serve while in Bangladesh. It was so great to be able to have face-to-face time. The following week our team met with him to go to a Bengali restaurant (sorta) and have a Q&A time. I do not know of any other teams that were able to meet with their contact yet. Therefore, this was a huge blessing. The food was a lot of potatoes and something that I cannot recall right now that begins with an L…. lentils! That’s it. Lots of sauces as well, not what I am used to in the least. It was a splendid evening.
We decided to have team meetings Sunday nights, 8:30-10:30. Last week the girls volunteered to make dinner, which was fabulous and put together a gift bag titled “Surviving Bangladesh” for Stephen, a boy on the team whose birthday happened to be that day. They decided on these things all on there own.
We have had other team times as well, we go to each other sporting events, concerts together, grabbing lunch together, its so great! I love love love it. We are already a family, how could God have blessed me with such great team chemistry.
This last week I was the due date for sending out sponsorship letters. I was able to get my first wave out.
Last weekend I had an all day leadership training day at CalBaptist. I learned so much, I cannot begin to write it all down. The sessions I went to were the ones God wanted me at! Andrew Gaines shared on the armor of God, ummm.. AMAZING. For lunch all teams (groups from APU, CalBaptist, Vanguard, San Diego Christian College, and even Simpson in Redding) were placed into rooms based upon the region they were traveling to and we shared our concerns, ideas, and such, then prayed for one another, such valuable time that I wish I could relive.
In two weekends training for all APU teams take place I believe in Twin Peaks. Should be excellent, I am greatly looking forward to it. Did I mention that I adore my co-leader and my team. Here’s a family picture:
Top Row: Angela, Lizzee, Chris, Stephen, Justin Bottom Row: Kyle, Taylor, Callee, Eddy, and me
An excerpt from a recent spiritual journey paper that I wrote:
I am now in training to co-lead a mission trip to Bangladesh this summer. It is so crazy. I am so honored by God. The people on my team may just possibly be the raddest people that applied to OWM missions 2010. This experience over seas will not be like anything I have seen or experienced before. Its kind of frightening. It is easy to fear what I have not seen, what I do not know, and what I cannot handle. However, the greatest concern is for the people I will be traveling with. They are somewhat entrusted in my will, and of course God’s will be done on earth as it is in Heaven, but I want them to be safe, healthy, happy, and having their needs met. I am ecstatic to say the least about my team and the bonding, growth, learning from one another, and love that will take place. For myself I am excited about seeing life differently, about finding God in my darkest hour, for building relationships, spreading love, and being forever changed. This trip is a once in a lifetime, probably not even that, perhaps one in several lifetimes, and I cannot fathom why God chose me, it blows my mind, and makes me joyful.
Currently, outside of direct preparation for my mission trip God has been transforming me in many areas of my life. Over Christmas break I read the book Captivating by John and Stasi Eldredge. I was able to see Christ as the lover of my soul, as truly everything. I had said this countless times before, however I still struggled with what that felt like. However, this book unlocked the door that I think God was trying to have me open for months. Things started to click. I better understand and accept the woman I am, the women and men around me, and that God is my everything and I can never look to a man to fulfill my needs because they can only fully be met by God and this was how I was designed. Another thing I have been learning is that plans change. God may speak to you one day causing you to go on a journey, but the destination you thought that path would take you to turns out completely different than you expected. It is important not to assume when it comes to the plans of God. I must let him lead, guide, and direct my steps without assuming I know the way or the ultimate purpose. I am always being taught more about grace and forgiveness. I do not think I will ever be done learning, but that is all the more fun I believe.
xoxo, mucho love! Corinne