Sunday, January 30, 2011

Re-evaluating the "talk"

This week has been a challenge, but the startup of Circles has brought a lot of..... hope.

I was out of town for work (for TWO weeks). The traveling for work lifestyle drains me quickly and offers little resource for being refilled, being loved, being encouraged... I was by myself working with two individuals who are older than myself, married, and can hold the title "boss." I felt alone, kinda abandoned. And I do not handle alone, isolation, being by myself very well. I actually am quite horrible at being alone. I was in Fresno, worked 8-5 and then was alone the rest of the evening. Where is the purpose when you aren't in relationship?!

So, to say the least, I was DRAINED when I made the drive back to the O.C.

I was given Friday OFF from work.... which rarely ever happens at my firm, but PRAISE the LORD, because I needed it. I was able to get things done around my apartment, sleep, and not have to be sitting in an office all day staring out a window into construction and fog. AND I was able to go to lunch at RH. So good, there were just three of us, but I was able to be myself, eat food, and laugh as stories were shared and glimpses of out lives were discussed. I didn't feel any sort or pressure, any expectations on me; I was just able to be there and enjoy it. This doesn't happen often; isn't that crazy? I constantly feel surrounded by expectations and people thinking I should act a certain way. Maybe its all in my head, but its how I feel.

Anyways, lunch was great. Loved it.
Saturday's meeting was great as well. Group discussion on listening & speaking, hollar. Identifying the noise and why I allow it to take away from conversations is something that I need to re-evaluate frequently. Learning to seek silence... ahhhh, I don't want to right now... but I need to!

All this to say... Circles, everyone's blogs, lunches together, meetings & discussing Jesus on Saturdays + everything else = brings Corinne HOPE :)

Okay, so I apologize for the mess that I have written.... it probably doesn't make any logical sense.


  1. Hey Corine, I love our group too and I think it so awesome that it is giving you hope :) I look forward to getting you and the rest of the group.

  2. Generally I am an introvert and usually like to be alone. The past few months I've been forced to be around people, and now I crave that interaction. Now when I have a few free hours that I need to fill, I get a nervous, anxious feeling. So glad the lunch was a time to pause, eat and enjoy friends. Looking forward to many more moments like that.

  3. So encouraging to hear this! I too have been working like crazy and can relate to the madness and frustrations that you just so correctly put :) I always tell myself this and will pass this on to you as it makes everyday at work a totally different day: my friend at work who is a great Christian man told me one day when I was super bummed about work, "just remember who you are REALLY working for :)" Having that perspective always turns my day around! I'm so stoked for you to be in circles! Hope work this week is great!

  4. Yay for Fridays off!! =) I didn't get a change to connect with you on Saturday but I hope to next week! Oh and btw...I love your name, it's beautiful. Just wanted to tell you that =)

  5. feeling lonely is one of the worst feelings in the world. i'm so glad that we are all part of a group that isn't just there for each other but points one another toward Jesus, the only one who can guarantee we will never be alone.

  6. Just got excited reading this. Don't know why other than how happy I am for you that there's hope, that there's some sign of roots growing.

    See you soon.

  7. Makes perfect sense Corinne! I feel the same way sometimes.
    What do you do for work?

  8. I love that you said Circles brings hope. I feel the same way... it is really refreshing and extremely refreshing. I am so excited for this family!

  9. makes sense to me... and love the flowers!

  10. "Learning to seek silence... ahhhh, I don't want to right now... but I need to!"

    that's so interesting! isn't it funny how when we get really overwhelmed by all we have to do and be around, we become comfortable with it? the chaos becomes our comfort zone and we crave more, rather than seeking rest and silence.